FEMALE MD
Sought for rural FP practice in West Virginia. Interests should include women's and adolescent health, as well as geriatrics and some pediatrics. Experience in transplant nephrology a plus. Labarotory work with spore-borne neurotoxins preferred. Fluency in Spanish and Chinese required. Apply in confidence. Marty Wu, MD, PhD, MBA, Director, Ozark Mountain Way Family Clinic. Box 2313.

EVIL GENIUS
Wanted for unorthodox experimentation and sinister machinations. FT/PT employment in castle near village. Cadavers, svelte assistant, hump-backed gnome provided. Full package of benefits incl. health, disability, and angry-mob-of-villagers-with-torches insurance. Deep, sinister, MU-ha-ha type laugh highly desirable. Contact Mr. Franklin Stein, c/o QFever, POB 297.

PRACTICE IN PLEASANTVILLE
Lookin' for a swell internist to join our group! We've been here 50 years strong servin' a couple o' generations in Pleasantville. We're lookin' for a real nice fella' or gal to hop on board with us. Dandy work environment. Soda shop and druggist around the corner. Some of the sweetest, prettiest secretaries you ever will see! You'll make a good wage and some real nice acquaintances, too! Write to Bill Wilcox, MD, Director, Pleasantville Clinic, Box 4077.