February 6, 2002 | Volume 3, Issue 1
 

Just like your
mamma used
to make it!

    
Medical Humor & Satire
For Healthcare Professionals

© Q Fever! 2000-2005
 
Menu
Current Issue
Back Issues
Q Fever! Book
Q Fever! Store
Spread The Q!
Support The Q!
Get Paid!
Contact Us

Mailing List
New issues, etc.

Choose:
text version
html version
Email:
Confirm Email:
The Q Fever! Book!
Makes a great gift!
only $13.99
 
Angioplasty Better Than Cabbage For
Coronary Artery Disease

Cole slaw particularly ineffective

DURHAM, NC--A researcher at Duke University Medical Center released last week the results of a study that could change the way many medical centers treat coronary artery disease.

Cabbage: No longer a viable option in treatment of CAD

The study, which involved hundreds of patients over over a five-year period, attempted to answer the question: Should a patient with severe coronary artery disease be treated with balloon angioplasty (with or without stenting), or given a cabbage?

"It's an age-old question, no doubt," said study chairman Dr. Harry Syvertsen. "But I think we can safely say now - whoever said cabbage was a good idea was an imbecile."

Indeed, the study found that, of the almost two hundred patients with symptomatic coronary vessel obstruction who were given heads of cabbage and sent home, every single one eventually required either emergency angioplasty or bypass grafting.

Of these, poorer outcomes were found in those patients who had attempted to make cole slaw or cabbage borscht, while cabbage stew and casserole lovers fared slightly better.

"All I know is, all these years my patients have been getting cabbages when, in my opinion, they should have gotten revascularized, or at least have had PTCA or stenting done," said Syvertsen. "They used to laugh at me when I said cabbage wasn't a good idea. Now I've got proof."

Syvertsen's study will be published in the Journal of the American College of Cabbology (JACC) later this month.

More Stuff!
 Get the Q Fever! Book!
 The Q Fever! Store!: T-shirts, caps, mugs, and thongs!
 Help Spread Q Fever!
 Support The Q!
 Make Money With The Q Fever! Affiliate Program!
 Subscribe to the Q Fever! Mailing List!
 Contact Q Fever!
Google
web qfever.com
Remember: Quality Without The Q Is Just Uality!
 
Editor-In-Chief: C. Burnetti, MD | Editor-At-Large: M. Furfur, MD, PhD
All rights reserved. © Q Fever!, LLC 2000-2005

Disclaimer: This is a medical humor and parody website meant solely for entertainment purposes, and is not intended to recommend or advise regarding the prevention, diagnosis, or treatment of any medical illness or condition. Stories and articles are meant only to provide a brief, fleeting distraction from the wretchedness of reality, and are not intended to be insensitive, callous, or offensive, or to otherwise belittle the plight of those affected with any medical disease, condition, or illness. All names and descriptions of people are fictitious except for those of well-known public figures, who are the subject of satire. Any resemblance to actual persons or events is purely coincidental. Medical Humor is just that: Medical Humor.