July 12, 2000 | Volume 1, Issue 3
 

Just like your
mamma used
to make it!

     
Medical Humor & Satire
For Healthcare Professionals
© Q Fever! 2000-2005
  
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Wanted: COSTA MESA, CA--Calif. licensed MD dude to score stash. Need active DEA number; knowledge of recreational pharmacology and hallucinogens preferred. Should posess some sort of big drug book where stash to be scored can be looked up and objectively assessed. Doctor dude must be, like, cool and not tell cops or parents about next Saturday at Chad's house.
Wanted: Unicellular protozoan with slightly eccentric nucleolus seeks same for meiotic rapture. Must possess slender Golgi body & unblemished endoplasmic reticulum. No chloroplasts. Previous haploidy experience preferred but not required. Pls provide neg HIV test. Fungi need not apply. Send mRNA to short arm of chromosome 12 if interested.
Wanted: BC/BE Emergency physician for real-time commentary on hospital-based televison dramas. Will be assigned to couch. An ideal candidate will comment on whether on-screen events would occur in a REAL emergency room. Must be willing to smile cryptically and murmur "It happens" when asked about exact frequency of open cardiac massage in local emergency rooms. Intermittent head shaking and snorting noises permitted. Free snacks. ACLS/ATLS.
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Editor-In-Chief: C. Burnetti, MD | Editor-At-Large: M. Furfur, MD, PhD
All rights reserved. © Q Fever!, LLC 2000-2005
Disclaimer: This is a medical humor and parody website meant solely for entertainment purposes, and is not intended to recommend or advise regarding the prevention, diagnosis, or treatment of any medical illness or condition. Stories and articles are meant only to provide a brief, fleeting distraction from the wretchedness of reality, and are not intended to be insensitive, callous, or offensive, or to otherwise belittle the plight of those affected with any medical disease, condition, or illness. All names and descriptions of people are fictitious except for those of well-known public figures, who are the subject of satire. Any resemblance to actual persons or events is purely coincidental. Medical Humor is just that: Medical Humor.